In Memory of My Brother: Why I Speak Up About Suicide.
A personal story of loss, reflection, and the mission to break the silence.
I will remember that day forever.
It was a Sunday in 2008. I was sitting in church when my phone started ringing. It was my brother. I didn’t answer at first. Then it rang again. And again. When I finally picked up, I could hear it in his voice before he even spoke the words that changed everything:
My brother had taken his own life.
On his 30th birthday.
The shock. The heartbreak. The unimaginable task of telling our mother that her child was gone. I will never forget that pain. I will also never forget that Rodney Lee, a close family friend, stood by me in that moment and drove me to my mom. Years later, Rodney would lose his own life to suicide too. And just recently, another family member— also ended his life. There was no connection between their stories, but the pain is all too familiar.
Suicide doesn’t just affect one person. It creates ripples through families, friendships, communities. It changes you. It changes everything.
And over the years, the list has grown. Friends, acquaintances, people from my hometown and beyond—so many lives lost to suicide. Each one a reminder that this crisis is real, widespread, and closer to home than many of us realize. There are far too many names, too many stories cut short. The grief is heavy, and it keeps coming.
For a long time, I didn’t talk about it. It felt too heavy. Too personal. But silence doesn’t help. It isolates us. It leaves people suffering alone. So now, I speak up.
I speak for my brother. I speak for Rodney. I speak for the others we’ve lost and the ones we’re scared to lose.
Mental health matters. Suicide is not weakness. Asking for help should never be met with shame.
If you’ve ever felt hopeless, please know this: you are not alone. You are not a burden. You are not invisible. Your life has value. You are needed.
I’ve learned that the strongest people can be fighting battles we don’t see. That connection saves lives. That checking in can make all the difference. We don’t need all the answers to help. We just need to care enough to show up.
If you or someone you know is struggling, call or text 988 – the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. It’s free, confidential, and available 24/7.
What I’ve Learned
- Suicide impacts everyone around the person lost.
- Cash flow. Purpose. Support. Accountability. All matter.
- Talking about mental health saves lives.
- The pain never fully goes away, but it can be turned into purpose.
What You Can Do
- Talk openly about mental health.
- Share the 988 Lifeline.
- Learn the signs.
- Listen with empathy.
- Be present.
Why I Keep Speaking Up
Because every time I share this story, someone tells me they needed to hear it. Because someone out there is struggling in silence. Because no one should ever feel that alone. Because my brother mattered. Rodney mattered. My friend mattered. And you matter.
This is my why. This is my voice. And this is my message:
Let’s show up for each other. Let’s be the reason someone stays.
If you are in crisis, please call or text 988. Help is available.
Written in memory of my brother, David A. Cook, and all the lives we've lost to suicide. I will never stop speaking their names.
David Cook
August 31, 2008
https://www.howardfuneralservice.com/obituary/david-cook
Rodney Jay Lee
January 22, 2017
https://www.rollerfuneralhomes.com/services.asp?locid=&page=odetail&id=43971
"Fix You” – Coldplay
A beautiful message about wanting to help someone through their darkest times.
https://youtu.be/k4V3Mo61fJM?si=_XQvXZE4vgAsNyNx
